Grow (W)here You Are Planted

  She opened her eyes and let the sunshine envelop her.  Weekends were always the best.  Dad was outside mowing the lawn and the rooster next door apparently had no inner clock.  She rolled over and felt the crisp sheets on her skin and smiled.   Dressed and ready to play, down the stairs she went to brush her teeth in the parents' bathroom to be followed by breakfast.  Johnny was already outside running around the backyard, being chased by the dogs, giant smile on his little kid face.  When he was happy all you could really see was his teeth.  They were big for his face though he would grow into them later in life and he would always need braces though he would never get them. Becky crunched cornflakes and watched as mom appeared and reappeared through the doorways in her view as she cleaned the house and brought it back to its best state = organization.  From the kitchen she told me to get outside and to remember to take some water with me and a lemonade for my dad.  He would be

 It just hit me I just read about something new coming in 2021 and at first, I felt like I always do when I read that phrase 'coming in 2021'.  That's SO far away.   But, today it hit me,  2021 starts in less than 50 days. All this time, this whole year, I think I've been waiting for 2020 to start.  The pandemic, the stress of lockdown, losing family to Covid, dealing with job loss and being unable to live the way I am used to makes me feel like I've been put on hold.  The year never really got started for me and, I fear, you either. So, what to do about it? well, all there is to do is keep moving forward.  I wake each day thankful for the sun or the rain or the wind as it expresses itself outside my window.  I am thankful for my Lola and my family and everyone I love and those they love and on and on.  I start my days with a long list of items I must accomplish as I create the life I've always dreamed of and rest my head on my pillow at night ready to get at th

  No Photos today. Today   I’m mailing the first jewelry order from my Etsy store,  https://www.etsy.com/shop/HotPinkBuddha  and  I’m so excited.   I want that feeling and set of actions to continue.   I want people to buy all my stuff because I love making stuff but I can’t make any more stuff until my stuff gets bought. Today is hard though.   The build up of everything over time.   Waking up and getting a paycheck that is not enough, again, to pay all the things I need to pay and then to see that my unemployment, that Florida has you reapply for each quarter, is not yet approved and I sent all the information they need and it’s still not active and the last unemployment check I got was in August and not having any response from the jobs I’ve applied for. I work so hard to be strong, to find the positive, or at least the hilarious, in my situation.  I try, and most times succeed, to appreciate the love around me, my family and friends even the ones I don't talk to...God, life is

 what you mean is During this bitch of a time. I hope you are well and I pray your days are filled with beauty and hope and constant realization of your strengths and abilities, of everything you already have within yourself.  I pray all of this goodness finds its way to everyone you love like I pray for the same to shoot straight for the mark...or the heart...to everyone I love and everyone they love and they love and so on and on through to the ends of the earth and into all of eternity so that even our ancestors can feel the joys of overcoming and standing tall in the light.   All the future kids are so set. but really, when has it not been a difficult time? When has everything been so 'just right' we couldn't contain ourselves? The goal is not happiness, it's the luck to be able to have so much to be thankful for and even more to work toward.  Yeah, I said toward...not towards.   My Lola dog naps while I type and it looks like it's going to rain...again...I'

 We get so used to this, our particular combination of skin, heart, and soul.  And we should, how else will we find the way to fight for ourselves and for the love we are and for the love we want to add to our lives? The love we need to share with you?? How much time is spent learning the wrong things just because 'that's how it's always been done' when we could just be and trust and learn to live and flow with each other? How much lovelier would the nature around us be if we could just earn to be? I dreamed of him last night.  I woke this morning in a hazy memory of pastry chefs in a white room with tall wooden tables, his chef jacket felt soft against my skin.  He looked into me in the golden light and I felt truer than I'd ever felt before.  He asked me to kiss him.  I did.  I can still feel him in my air... such a calming presence reminding me of love. Image by  Игорь Левченко  from  Pixabay  

 My momma was born in Kenosha, WI.  She came to Earth three years after her sister, the fourth in a line of siblings born two years apart.  As a child, her favorite response was 'in a minute'.  The running family joke was she had been saying those words since before she was born...hence the 3-year difference between her and my Aunt E. That extra year, and being the last child, gave her something she often mentioned as one of the luckiest parts of her childhood.  See, when she was born, there was finally a little money in the bank.  The rest of the kids had jobs and could pay for their own fun, and all the punishments had mostly been had.  Linda came into a world where she and her mother Susan could get to know each other a little differently.  They could spend uninterrupted time with each other.  I hope she never felt guilty because of it...I hope I'm not sharing too much by sharing it here. I feel it timely to let you know that my momma was white of French and Czech* desce

 I hate confrontation.   Hate is a strong word and gives the 'thing' too much power.  Instead I'll say confrontation is one of the challenges in life that I am working through.  Don't get me wrong, I am no shrinking violet, but when I must confront a situation or person I do it with the grace of a slow ripping, super sticky band aid...on an arm...a very hairy arm. springing through - Rebecca Scott I know you've felt it,ugh...it is a sharp pain and you watch the hairs pull and pull and you have to stop, concentrate, maybe even close your eyes and just rrrrRRR RRIP that sucker off as fast as you can . That's what it feels like to me when I confront you.  It won't feel nice and it's almost like if I have to do it then you will also suffer how bad I am at it.  It'll happen fast and feel detached no matter how long we've known and loved each other.  My only hope is that the rest of our relationship exemplifies my love and respect for you enough to cov

 Ok, so this is the thing. I'm not sure what the deal is here.  I started a blog years ago but have been less than consistent posting my writings here.  I want to change that.  So here we go. Zona Colonial by Rebecca Scott I'll start with a re-introduction.  I'm not sure if I really introduced myself at the beginning of this and, if you have read any of my posts, you have a pretty good idea of who I am.  Yes, all three of you that read this blog are pretty fantastic.  Heck, I'm not even sure it's the same three reading my posts every time...heh...no matter.  I am writing for anyone reading that might feel 'less' or 'stranger than most' or just wants to see what strange and unusual Dominicans who live in Florida write about when left to their own devices. Mini Publico by Rebecca Scott Parked in Bani by Rebecca Scott There we go. I was born on a sunny afternoon in Santo Domingo in the Dominican Republic to an American mother and a Dominican father.   B

I wish you could see what I see. You are bright  and strong and beautiful. We are all made better because you are here.

Image by  FelixMittermeier  from  Pixabay I’m having a day. The kind of day that feels like everything is going wrong. I can’t get my Internet to work which means I can’t work which means I won’t get paid which means my scheduled-to-actually-worked score will decrease which means I’ll get fewer hours which means I’ll make even less money. and I’m already not making enough money because this is a part time job plus I’m not receiving the $600 a week unemployment insurance because people in other situations, in other places are making decisions that affect me directly and I have allowed that to be the case by not taking full control of my life much earlier because I was still putting myself together with the pieces left after many years of grieving in the place where my heart broke...where I spent so much time trying to rebuild instead building anew. And let's talk about control...I mean control as much as ‘control’ means to me not what it may mean to you, what the dictionary def

 ok so this is the thing do I really love to write? or do I just know that it would be a great way to make money? The fact that I ask that question might mean I'm in it for the money. The fact that I've been writing since I was 10 years old is more telling, I think. I remember buying a new notebook entirely with the plan that I would begin to write the story of my life.  At 10, I already knew I was living an extraordinary life full of extraordinary people and the experience was and would continue to be worthy of sharing. I also know, right around the same time, that pressing that button on a camera felt just as good as that first breath after a deep dive in the pool.  Every time. Image by  Free-Photos  from  Pixabay   I found the first two photos I took entirely with the mindset that I would become a photographer.   My aunt and uncle, Eileen and Don, were photographers who also happened to be a music teacher and lawyer.  The story goes they met in the elevator while my aunt was

Image by  Norbert Pietsch  from  Pixabay I am living. I walk around and do things. I sit and relax, maybe watch t.v. or tickle my Lola. During any and all of these moments, thoughts travel in the universe that is my mind and they grow wings...or wheels It's so easy for me to get lost in thought that I forget to share.  I forget that I should be sitting in front of a screen with a keyboard.  I should be spewing the things that are happening in my head. I swear so many of these thoughts just happen. and I get to spend time wandering and flowing the path that they create. I always see thoughts and ideas as energy speeding right past just above our heads...the creative ones are just the ones that decided to grab one or two or... Some thoughts have created indentations on the path like an old rickety horse drawn cart slowly making its way through a town,  patiently on its way home. Other thoughts are new and, while I'm in them, I can look around and see colors and shapes. Sometimes,

River Ridge, Georgia, 2011, Rebecca Scott               You know those lovely Sunday afternoons, where you finally relax enough to just be? You're home alone or at your best friend's house just aiming your eyes at the TV. The sound is down because you're both tired and want to enjoy the sound of the rain outside. You let yourself go in and out of consciousness, napping most of the day. Then you hear the rain slow to a constant, slow drip just outside the open window. I call that a gray day. It might actually be gray with clouds and fo g or it might even be sunny and so hot nothing seems to move. Those days are life for me. They mean I have finally reached a moment where I can breathe. All my muscles are unwound and my breathing is slow and deep. Occasionally one corner of my mouth turns up...all by itself, as my mind wanders into and out of memories. When I moved to Florida, I worried I wouldn't get perfect gray days anymore. For over 20 years, Georgia pro

Photo credit: Unknown Photo credit: Unknown Dear Diary The day started early and gray hard rain falling in the lake ducks huddling for warmth under a tree This is my kind of day where I can breathe in the scent of wet leaves and earth where the surprise of drop of cold water can make you jump and giggle. ________________________________________________________________________________ Photo credit: Rebecca Scott I have this little plant in a cute little pot. It grows and it grows it is strong because it knows. ________________________________________________________________________________

purchased from  https://weposters.com/ When I find something that speaks to me, the feeling is overwhelming.  There is no question that THIS is good, meaningful and on my path. It's like I'm walking on a beautiful, green path on a bright, colorful day and suddenly, when I look down to my feet, I stop.  I pick up the most beautiful, shining orb and it is shooting warm light out of itself and right at me. And it feels good. It'll look good on the wall too... The work I've been doing on the inside is showing as a particular style and color scheme that is reminiscent of my childhood home and life but also with a twist.  Browns, blues and all the bohemian combos thereof as well as the occasional gold and hot-ass pink with lots and lots of plants... from Architectural Digest hmmm...Look at this room!!! I"m in love and in understanding...soon, when I've finally finished unpacking the last couple of boxes, I'll post some photos of my apartment...I love it. Things a

Photo Credit Rebecca Scott There's something to be said for allowing the words to just happen. It may just be my luck, or maybe I've found the space where I can allow myself to just be in such a way that ideas and feelings just find their way onto a page, through me. Whatever it is, it is. Mornings are the best right now.  Slow mornings give way to a relaxed job.  I work for a few hours and then take my scheduled break and have lunch, love on my dog and think about all the things I want to do, to make and all the places I'll go when it is feasible to do so. Health concerns being what they are and finding myself in a serious desire to NOT get sick with this virus, travel is limited, duh, to 3 or 4 spots depending on the day and the need.  Home, Brother's house, grocery store, and sometimes one other house for dinner with the fam.  Just the other day, I felt it...the thing so many are feeling and started feeling much earlier in this semi-quarantine time...I NEEDED to be s

photo credit : Rebecca Scott John and Linda were kind and strong, full of love and easy to laughter, powerful beyond universe, unflinching and to the point. They moved forward with an ease that I am still learning to settle into it started early my worry about money the 4 of us, mom dad bro and me would do everything together it rocked when we’d drive home from school or to the store or to/from anywhere my parents would talk about money how to make what we had work what needs took precedence being the oldest and a Capricorn I would make sure to be quiet so they could have the space to figure things out and in that quiet, I’d listen I have never developed a positive process with money I often buy more than I need just in case i run out of money  I’ve aways been a spender as soon as I have some extra I proceed to shop for all the things I couldn’t buy before the influx This is, insanely, the first time I’ve had this realization...I’

Rebecca Scott it’s  been years... years of figuring out who to be, where to be, why to be. fluttering moments of bookended with such trying. I can only hope it was for a reason. it was. I had to get here somehow and  I could only walk this path. Here. Am I here? do I exist or am I just dreaming so? what happens to me when the dreamer awakes? is she already and just a little sleepy still? —sometimes when I wake in the morning when I just gaze at the back-lit curtain, letting thoughts become what they wish, I smile. This one is really interesting and wild.    I must remember what I felt during this other bit and grow it patiently in the real.    It’s like finding puzzle pieces in the dark and then finding where they fit.